Doormat
[!Benefit of being a doormat]- control other peoples' behaviour
when you're a doormat, you know exactly how they're gonna respond (walk all over you)
[!When is it beneficial to be a doormat?]- abusive relationship
if you're a doormat, you know they won't beat you up, leave you, abuse you
[!How to stop being a doormat]- surrender, give up control
stand up to them and let them react how they react When did I learn that I couldn't afford to piss anyone off?
[!Why it's hard to stop being a doormat]- we misdiagnose the problem
we think we're weak so we build our strength up
we continue to be doormats because our brain wants a safe outcome
"oh I need to be in more control, I need to be assertive" when what we need is to let go of control to address the cause of the doormat